Bob loved golf and played at least once a week until he was 94! Charlie was a pretty decent curler until he was side-lined by a stroke in his 80's. Agathe had been a good swimmer until her health took a turn for the worse in her mid-seventies. Eleanor loved skating and was nearing 100 when I had the pleasure of her company.
When I met these people, they were a little discouraged by their lack of exercise and had turned into arm-chair athletes. It didn't dampen their joy of sport though, they were enthusiastic cheerers whether it was watching their favorite game on t.v. or hearing scores on the radio.
I looked for ways that I could keep recreation in their life on some level. While many care homes have activity aids who provide carpet bowling, Wii sports, balloon toss, pretend polo, and the like, it still can be difficult to meet the needs of some residents. It just required some thought on my part as to what was realistic given eyesight and mobility issues of my clients.
I got Bob's niece to get his golf bag out of storage and dust off his putter. We set up a little practise area in the hall of his suite at the retirement home. It consisted of a device that spat his golf ball back at him after he got it in the centre. That kept him happy for a little while but sadly he fell in his bathroom one day and broke his arm, so golf was definitely out. He was content after that to have the golf channel on his television and watch the pros. As well, I took him for car rides past the golf course and once I asked him if would just like to rent a cart and go around the course, to which he declined. It was a part of his life that he had been ready to let go of.
Charlie set out on his own one day driving his electric scooter and heading straight for the World Championship of Curling being held at our local arena. The head nurse at the care home was not pleased. She had passed him in her car and had pulled over and demanded that he go back to the home because she didn't think he had the eyesight to be out maneuvering along busy city sidewalks. Charlie was irate and defied her concern over liability issues and kept right on going. She relayed all this to me upon returning to the care home where I was visiting his wife and I offered to go out and look for him. I ran along the streets and found him just a block away from the event. He was still annoyed but happy to have some company and I led him into the venue and found him a rink-side place to park his scooter in the wheelchair section. He was happy to see a good game or two that day and enjoyed yelling "Sweep" at his favorite team members. I walked beside his scooter on the way back and made sure he got to the home in one piece.
One of my fondest memories of Agathe was taking her on a hot, summer day to a local lake for a swim. She had many health issues but I felt she could manage once she got in the water. We walked in up to our waists and then she dove in with me swimming close beside her. She was so graceful and her joy was obvious. The image, even now, is easy to recall in my mind. I can see her with the sun beaming warmly upon her and the water droplets shining like diamonds on her face.
She had a fall a few weeks later and broke her hip. Never again could we go swimming as her health deteriorated but I know that weightless freedom, that care free hour we spent doing something she loved and was good at and required no memory recall was a special time for her.
Eleanor, another dear friend of mine, seemed to exist on dark chocolate, vanilla yogurt, and the occasional sandwich! Her eyesight was good at nearly 100, her hearing terrible, and her sense of humour well intact. Once I caught her throwing back Cadbury's candy coated eggs into her mouth looking quite pleased with herself. I knew that besides chocolate and good jokes she loved watching figure skating. I kept an eye out for competitions while perusing the television guide. If I saw that a competition or championship figure skating event was coming on I would get her comfy and then tune her in with either her headset turned up loud or text scrolling at the bottom so as not to disturb the others in her room. When figure skating would be on, she was fully entertained and in her element. If I wasn't going to be around, I would put a sign up at her bedside table notifying the care aids of the event. The sticky note would have day, time, and channel as a reminder so that all they had to do was turn on the t.v. for her.
If you know someone who seems to be a little down because of their inactivity, find out what they did for recreation and then re-create it.
Wednesday 26 October 2011
Wednesday 19 October 2011
Gone But Not Forgotten
Approximately five years ago while volunteering on the geriatric ward of a local hospital I chatted with a most remarkable patient. She was bright and cheerful and chatty. It didn't take long for her to tell me that she was ninety and that up until recently had been very healthy and very independent. She lived alone and had done very well, that was, until she had fallen.
With no family and living in her own home, she found herself completely and utterly helpless lying on the carpet with a broken hip! She called out loudly but with no neighbours living in close proximity it was to no avail. She tried to move to get to the phone to call 911 but she just could not reach it.
Eventually after more than two days of pain and solitude, this woman had nearly given up. She was hungry, thirsty and cold, and she began to beseech The Almighty more fervently than ever to assist her, when all of a sudden she heard a booming voice. (She relayed to me that she was sure it was the voice of her late husband.)
"Do you see that magazine on the desk above you"? said the voice
"Yes," she answered in a faint whisper. She was sure she was delirious.
"Grab it" said the voice even louder.
"I can't!!" said my friend
"Yes you can!" said the voice
"take it and put it under you!"
so she tried and found that by stretching her arm up she managed to reach it and after one or two tries succeeded in getting the magazine to fall down beside her.
It was then that she had new resolve and determination, even in her malnourished and weakened state, and placed the glossy magazine under her bottom whereby she managed to scoot little by little across the carpet where she was able to alert -with a new found yell- the passing letter carrier, of her predicament. The postman called 911 and this dear lady was brought to hospital where she was now recouperating.
I was in awe of her by this time, I guess we had visited nearly 30 minutes, and she had become my hero. I was so inspired by her. She told me she wasn't ready to die and that she still had a lot of living to do and then I don't know why exactly she told me this information but she did, she said "and when I do go, I am leaving all my money to the SPCA," adding "I love animals and that's what I want to do."
I had often wondered about her after our visit. It was doubtful that she could go on living in her own home as she was going to need more care (and possibly be using a wheelchair) although she was hopeful she'd be walking again soon. The next time I went to see her at the hospital she had been discharged.
Well, the other day, after so many years of wondering about "Super Woman" I got my answer. It was there on the front page of the newspaper. The headline read:
To SPCA with love: a $2.5-million estate
A decades old friendship and a lifelong love of animals have given Victoria SPCA its largest-ever bequest.
Gladys Cavanagh, a former Oak Bay resident who died last fall at the age of 95, willed her entire estate, worth $2.5 million to Victoria SPCA to be used for capital projects.
The money came to Cavanagh from a friend and she always believed she was holding it in trust and that it should eventually go to the SPCA
Cavanagh, who spent her last years in an assisted living home was a private person who had been devoted to animals since she was a young woman in Winnipeg and volunteered at an animal shelter with her mother....
(Victoria Times Colonist dated Sept.29, 2011)
This bit of advice now from me to you: if your aging loved one lives alone, please see that they have a subscription to one of the glossy magazines such as National Geographic in case they need it in an emergency.
In all seriousness though, make sure they have someone who can check on them daily. Gladys didn't have any family but there are volunteer services that provide people to phone seniors at a certain time each day and if they don't answer, they send someone to check. Gladys could have also worn an alert button around her neck or wrist, many companies provide a service for a monthly fee to check on subscribers if the button is pushed. There are also many new devices that are wireless and voice activated or react to a clap or whistle or a fall (!) to turn on and call 911. If you are looking for such a service there are many listed in the yellow pages of your phone directory under Medical Alarms and other safety gadgets can be found at medical supply stores, computer stores, security companies, and The Source (still known in the USA as Radio Shack) has something that is more for personal safety if a person falls or is attacked outside. It is called "Personal Alarm" and it is made by Nexxtech. It is a necklace and if a person needs help, they pull a pin on the necklace and a screeching alarm sounds> It is sure to bring attention! It costs $10.
With no family and living in her own home, she found herself completely and utterly helpless lying on the carpet with a broken hip! She called out loudly but with no neighbours living in close proximity it was to no avail. She tried to move to get to the phone to call 911 but she just could not reach it.
Eventually after more than two days of pain and solitude, this woman had nearly given up. She was hungry, thirsty and cold, and she began to beseech The Almighty more fervently than ever to assist her, when all of a sudden she heard a booming voice. (She relayed to me that she was sure it was the voice of her late husband.)
"Do you see that magazine on the desk above you"? said the voice
"Yes," she answered in a faint whisper. She was sure she was delirious.
"Grab it" said the voice even louder.
"I can't!!" said my friend
"Yes you can!" said the voice
"take it and put it under you!"
so she tried and found that by stretching her arm up she managed to reach it and after one or two tries succeeded in getting the magazine to fall down beside her.
It was then that she had new resolve and determination, even in her malnourished and weakened state, and placed the glossy magazine under her bottom whereby she managed to scoot little by little across the carpet where she was able to alert -with a new found yell- the passing letter carrier, of her predicament. The postman called 911 and this dear lady was brought to hospital where she was now recouperating.
I was in awe of her by this time, I guess we had visited nearly 30 minutes, and she had become my hero. I was so inspired by her. She told me she wasn't ready to die and that she still had a lot of living to do and then I don't know why exactly she told me this information but she did, she said "and when I do go, I am leaving all my money to the SPCA," adding "I love animals and that's what I want to do."
I had often wondered about her after our visit. It was doubtful that she could go on living in her own home as she was going to need more care (and possibly be using a wheelchair) although she was hopeful she'd be walking again soon. The next time I went to see her at the hospital she had been discharged.
Well, the other day, after so many years of wondering about "Super Woman" I got my answer. It was there on the front page of the newspaper. The headline read:
To SPCA with love: a $2.5-million estate
A decades old friendship and a lifelong love of animals have given Victoria SPCA its largest-ever bequest.
Gladys Cavanagh, a former Oak Bay resident who died last fall at the age of 95, willed her entire estate, worth $2.5 million to Victoria SPCA to be used for capital projects.
The money came to Cavanagh from a friend and she always believed she was holding it in trust and that it should eventually go to the SPCA
Cavanagh, who spent her last years in an assisted living home was a private person who had been devoted to animals since she was a young woman in Winnipeg and volunteered at an animal shelter with her mother....
(Victoria Times Colonist dated Sept.29, 2011)
This bit of advice now from me to you: if your aging loved one lives alone, please see that they have a subscription to one of the glossy magazines such as National Geographic in case they need it in an emergency.
In all seriousness though, make sure they have someone who can check on them daily. Gladys didn't have any family but there are volunteer services that provide people to phone seniors at a certain time each day and if they don't answer, they send someone to check. Gladys could have also worn an alert button around her neck or wrist, many companies provide a service for a monthly fee to check on subscribers if the button is pushed. There are also many new devices that are wireless and voice activated or react to a clap or whistle or a fall (!) to turn on and call 911. If you are looking for such a service there are many listed in the yellow pages of your phone directory under Medical Alarms and other safety gadgets can be found at medical supply stores, computer stores, security companies, and The Source (still known in the USA as Radio Shack) has something that is more for personal safety if a person falls or is attacked outside. It is called "Personal Alarm" and it is made by Nexxtech. It is a necklace and if a person needs help, they pull a pin on the necklace and a screeching alarm sounds> It is sure to bring attention! It costs $10.
Wednesday 12 October 2011
She wasn't a Shrinking Violet
As the season change is upon us and we are gradually accepting that it is autumn and that we have to start wearing coats and boots, let us not forget those who cannot go outside whenever they wish. Those who have lost their mobility and can only sit looking out the window.
One of those was an octogenarian named Violet who sat longingly looking out at the brawny construction workers on the scaffolding of the building outside her care home. It was there that I would find her sitting in her wheelchair whiling away the hours until the next meal or the next carpet bowling session. No coaxing was needed to get her to go outside with me. "Let's go for a walk", I would say "I love pushing people around!"
I would get her coat on and out we'd go, first to look at the construction site and then for a little walk around the neighbourhood. Often we'd stop in at the corner store to get her a scratch and win lottery ticket, and on the way back I would pick up falling maple leaves for her to hold in her hands.
It was on one such day whilst dodging rain drops I accidentally pushed her chair through a mud puddle. Expecting her to scream at me to watch where I was going, she instead ordered me to "Do it again!"
With her cackling with glee I ran through the water once more and the drops sprayed up and over us. I realized at that moment that our carefree attitude of childhood gets lost over the years and then returns in our sunset years. I then decided to encourage it as the naughtiness is not followed by scolding. On rainy days thereafter, I would dress Violet in a waterproof poncho, (they only cost a dollar at the dollar store) and off we would go to face the elements. It made her feel alive! It made me laugh.
One of those was an octogenarian named Violet who sat longingly looking out at the brawny construction workers on the scaffolding of the building outside her care home. It was there that I would find her sitting in her wheelchair whiling away the hours until the next meal or the next carpet bowling session. No coaxing was needed to get her to go outside with me. "Let's go for a walk", I would say "I love pushing people around!"
I would get her coat on and out we'd go, first to look at the construction site and then for a little walk around the neighbourhood. Often we'd stop in at the corner store to get her a scratch and win lottery ticket, and on the way back I would pick up falling maple leaves for her to hold in her hands.
It was on one such day whilst dodging rain drops I accidentally pushed her chair through a mud puddle. Expecting her to scream at me to watch where I was going, she instead ordered me to "Do it again!"
With her cackling with glee I ran through the water once more and the drops sprayed up and over us. I realized at that moment that our carefree attitude of childhood gets lost over the years and then returns in our sunset years. I then decided to encourage it as the naughtiness is not followed by scolding. On rainy days thereafter, I would dress Violet in a waterproof poncho, (they only cost a dollar at the dollar store) and off we would go to face the elements. It made her feel alive! It made me laugh.
Wednesday 5 October 2011
I Scream, You Scream, We all Scream for ICECREAM!
Did anyone ever say to you "You are what you eat"? I recall being told that many times in my childhood and probably more during my teens when I was buying my own junk food. Fast forward several years while travelling in the company of those now the same age as my parents and I am telling them to watch what they consume.
"Drink plenty of fluids so you don't get dehydrated" I tell those living in seniors residences, while at the same time peeling and cutting up apples for those without teeth and insisting that "an apple a day, keeps the doctor away."
One of those who smirked as I nagged about nutrition was dear old Kay. I took her for a drive three times a week. Her short term memory loss was severe but she never forgot to ask for ice cream. Chocolate was her favorite flavour although according to her she had never met an ice cream flavour she didn't like
I would get her a cone and we would sit down by the water and make small talk. Nothing too in depth, just lots of laughs in between satisfied "mmm's" as she whittled down the frozen delight with precision. Once I asked her if she would like a cup of coffee to wash down the ice cream, to which she replied "why would I do that?" "I want that flavour to stick with me for a while!"
In all four seasons, Kay would want her ice cream, it didn't matter the weather. It did start to matter to me though when she started turning the cone to the side and eating the ice cream like it was corn on the cob. The drips running down her hand and onto the seat of my van. Her confusion had her still liking the taste but forgetting how to properly eat it. I took to getting it for her in a bowl with a spoon, and when those skills deteriorated, I got her a milkshake to suck up through a straw.
There came a time when we no longer went for drives together.Her body becoming frailer, her speech getting limited, she spent longer periods in silence and I would sit with her at the hospital. Remarkably she was still the 'queen of the spelling bee',and when I would ask her how to spell ice cream, she would amaze the nurses and everyone around her by coming out of her stupor and saying clearly "I-C-E C-R-E-A-M" followed by "C-H-O-C-O-L-A-T-E!"
The moral of this story: take your fish oil, drink lots of water, eat your apple a day, do your crossword puzzles, treat yourself once in a while, and practise your spelling. It will take you far in life!
"Drink plenty of fluids so you don't get dehydrated" I tell those living in seniors residences, while at the same time peeling and cutting up apples for those without teeth and insisting that "an apple a day, keeps the doctor away."
One of those who smirked as I nagged about nutrition was dear old Kay. I took her for a drive three times a week. Her short term memory loss was severe but she never forgot to ask for ice cream. Chocolate was her favorite flavour although according to her she had never met an ice cream flavour she didn't like
I would get her a cone and we would sit down by the water and make small talk. Nothing too in depth, just lots of laughs in between satisfied "mmm's" as she whittled down the frozen delight with precision. Once I asked her if she would like a cup of coffee to wash down the ice cream, to which she replied "why would I do that?" "I want that flavour to stick with me for a while!"
In all four seasons, Kay would want her ice cream, it didn't matter the weather. It did start to matter to me though when she started turning the cone to the side and eating the ice cream like it was corn on the cob. The drips running down her hand and onto the seat of my van. Her confusion had her still liking the taste but forgetting how to properly eat it. I took to getting it for her in a bowl with a spoon, and when those skills deteriorated, I got her a milkshake to suck up through a straw.
There came a time when we no longer went for drives together.Her body becoming frailer, her speech getting limited, she spent longer periods in silence and I would sit with her at the hospital. Remarkably she was still the 'queen of the spelling bee',and when I would ask her how to spell ice cream, she would amaze the nurses and everyone around her by coming out of her stupor and saying clearly "I-C-E C-R-E-A-M" followed by "C-H-O-C-O-L-A-T-E!"
The moral of this story: take your fish oil, drink lots of water, eat your apple a day, do your crossword puzzles, treat yourself once in a while, and practise your spelling. It will take you far in life!
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