How often is it that you get a chance to voice your concern over treatment at a hospital? I thought it was wonderful that I received a survey when picking up my father upon his discharge from the geriatric ward last week. Dad had overstayed his welcome. They needed his bed for others who were requiring acute care.
After nearly a three month stint in hospital, my mother and I were offered placement for him at a local intermediate care facility. We accepted, although we are still hoping to get him into a care home closer to where Mom lives. Ideally we would have liked to have him return to his home but his memory issues had become bigger than all of us.
Getting back to the survey, I had very little bad to say about his stay in hospital. Dad enjoyed the food and the service was good. Sure, it wasn't home, but most of the nurses, care aids, kitchen staff, activity workers, occupational therapists, social workers, etc. tried their darndest to make my father feel at ease.
As the head nurse and the social worker told me, my comments would help them to work even better as a team. My only bit of constructive criticism was a slight chastisement of some of the staff ( a very small percentage of them) who spoke to dementia patients like it was their own fault they were agitated. Instead of recognizing the memory problem and confusion as being scary and uncontrolled, a couple of them had responded to Dad's insecurity with "so, what else is new?" or "He's always scared".
Many of the staff members were amazing. It isn't an easy job to have the same question asked of you over and over again or having disturbing vocalizations going on for hours at a time. The hospital employees of ward 2-SE held their heads high and with a kind word or touch made patients and family members feel at ease. They spoke to distressed patients in the manner they deserved to be spoken to, with kindness and compassion. Replacing the queries of the patients with "I think maybe you feel nervous because you don't know what is going on." Adding, "Perhaps I can help you feel better about this situation".
Some worked a full shift to 11pm and then when a co-worker called in sick, they came back and worked again the next morning at 7am. Not much turn around time to be well-rested and happy, but amazingly, they were.
I didn't make note of these things on the survey, there wasn't really a place for too many compliments. There were your basic questions about food, cleanliness, etc. Was I "really satisfied", "somewhat satisfied", "disappointed/did not meet expectations". Believe me, I was quite satisfied. My father received above average care in a brand new facility. The head nurse thanked me for handing in my survey and said she would pass along my comments to the social worker to read and process and make recommendations.
Thinking back on it now, I should have mentioned in the comments section that the taps were a little hard to operate for someone who is accustomed to using knobs to turn on and off the water. The 'wave your hands' under the faucet took a while for someone with memory issues to remember. Of course I realize those types of units are installed for sanitation reasons. Fewer germs if one does not have to turn on and off taps. As well, learning to operate the lights in his room was difficult for him, as the switches weren't always close to the light source.
It's give and take there at the hospital and I did take suggestions from the staff as well. Recommendations to buy my father some non-slip socks. The kind with rubberized soles. Since he didn't like to wear his slippers, the socks would be a good addition to his wardrobe and keep him safe from potential falls. Medical supply stores have those kind of stockings and I will be picking up a pair or two tomorrow.
Other ideas that were given to me by relatives, I certainly took note of, like recommending to my mother that she hire a driver to take her to and from the hospital to see Dad. She mostly preferred riding the two buses but on occasion let people drive her the 30 minute trip to visit at the hospital.
Although I have worked with seniors with dementia for many years I am not too proud to learn new tricks. Redirecting negative thoughts of loved ones to reflect the positive things, is still a skill that I am acquiring. The social worker loaned my mother and I a DVD which contained lots of useful information on dealing with the grief, anger, and loss, that people go through when losing a family member in the fog of Alzheimer's Disease/Dementia.
Taking time for myself even though the guilt and desire to be at my father's side overwhelms me, has been a hard one to learn. My friend suggested I join her beginners yoga class, which I did this past Monday. I haven't achieved Nirvana (actually it wasn't Buddhist meditation) in just one lesson but I learned some breathing exercises, some good stretches, and had the best nap I've had in ages.
"Namaste" one and all! When we are open to suggestions, we honour the spirit in ourselves and each other.
