When grandparents are living in a care home it can sometimes be difficult to persuade the grandchildren to pay them a visit. We know that the elderly forget names and faces and occasionally they show disinterest in the young ones. It's hard to convince the kids that it's nothing they've done that has taken the smile off of Grandma or Grandpa's face.
More often though visitors to care homes be they young or old are greeted with extreme delight. Eyes become brighter, body language becomes younger as they sit up straighter to show an obvious interest in their guests.
It's human nature to want to remember someone in their best form, choosing to have an image of health and vitality etched into the mind. Opting to stop visits because it makes us too sad to see our loved one frail and aging, while understandable, can often result in guilt.
Here are age appropriate ways to make your visits as pleasant as possible. Explain to little children before you enter that we need to use our soft indoor voices so as not to startle the other grandparents who live there. Tell them that there may be a few smells they don't like but that they should try to keep smiling.
If possible, bring your loved one to a sun room or den or if the weather permits, to a garden for more of a private visit. That way it takes your little visitors away from the areas that may have unpleasant odors.
Enjoying ice cream or cookies with Granny can be a good memory maker and make her smile but find out in advance if there are any dietary restrictions and follow accordingly. There may be swallowing problems or diabetes present so please check with the nurse or care aid.
Plan ahead of time to bring a photo album or coach the kids about reading for them or singing for them and explain that this will make Grandpa's heart happier.
Remember,even if our loved one's body and mind are deteriorating, and no matter how hesitant kids are to visit, and this goes for yourself as well, their soul is intact and will be refreshed and gladdened by your love and attention.
Send me your ideas and stories about how you have made visits special and I will publish them.
Tuesday, 4 September 2012
Friday, 31 August 2012
Thursday, 23 August 2012
Are you a Super Ager?
Every week a new headline, a new study, a new piece of research says that diet and exercise will keep us young but also that genetics play a huge role in whether we will have a sharp mind into our golden years.
On the radio the other day, guest Emily Rogalski from the Cognitive Neurology and Alzheimer's Disease Center at Northwestern University in Chicago, told listeners that the study conducted by her department at Northwestern showed there is more than one path to being a SuperAger.
Ms Rogalski remarked that even if genetics is involved we should not give up the healthy way of living. In her study she found that SuperAgers are from different walks of life, different socio-economic backgrounds, different cultures, etc. She commented that some enjoyed exercise and some did not. While diet and exercise were important for some who participated in the study, it was not important for others. Here's a link with more about the results of the study
http://www.canada.com/health/superagers+have+brains+similar+those+years+younger+study/7102249/story.html
The bottom line is that SuperAgers don't lose brains cells very fast and the cortex in their brain is thicker. Lucky people! I bet their teeth are good too. No plaque and certainly no gum disease. An article in today's paper cites a US Study from the University of California that followed nearly 5,500 elderly people (yikes, sounds like stalking to me!) over an 18-year period and found that those who reported brushing their teeth less than once a day were up to 65 per cent more likely to develop dementia than those who brushed daily.
The best advice I can offer after all this is that you should keep in mind there are TWO signs that you are NOT a SuperAger. The FIRST is the loss of memory, the other one escapes me. Hmmm.
On the radio the other day, guest Emily Rogalski from the Cognitive Neurology and Alzheimer's Disease Center at Northwestern University in Chicago, told listeners that the study conducted by her department at Northwestern showed there is more than one path to being a SuperAger.
Ms Rogalski remarked that even if genetics is involved we should not give up the healthy way of living. In her study she found that SuperAgers are from different walks of life, different socio-economic backgrounds, different cultures, etc. She commented that some enjoyed exercise and some did not. While diet and exercise were important for some who participated in the study, it was not important for others. Here's a link with more about the results of the study
http://www.canada.com/health/superagers+have+brains+similar+those+years+younger+study/7102249/story.html
The bottom line is that SuperAgers don't lose brains cells very fast and the cortex in their brain is thicker. Lucky people! I bet their teeth are good too. No plaque and certainly no gum disease. An article in today's paper cites a US Study from the University of California that followed nearly 5,500 elderly people (yikes, sounds like stalking to me!) over an 18-year period and found that those who reported brushing their teeth less than once a day were up to 65 per cent more likely to develop dementia than those who brushed daily.
The best advice I can offer after all this is that you should keep in mind there are TWO signs that you are NOT a SuperAger. The FIRST is the loss of memory, the other one escapes me. Hmmm.
Thursday, 26 July 2012
Not Just A Job
It is with profound gratitude flowing from my heart that I honour those people who work in health care for the love of caring for others. Specifically, men and women engaging in caring for the aging population.
One day last Spring I met a guy named Andy who owns his own office janitorial company and normally works at night. He explained to me that he likes to visit with seniors and so he has kept an on-call position at a nursing home so that he can still work with people who remind him of his grandparents.
The seniors facilities in my city are full of people with similar stories, the only difference is that they work full time and not just once in a while like Andy. The common link between janitor and care aid is the love for the residents. This was obvious last week when I brought my father back to the care home where he lives. Dad had been away for several weeks in hospital and when I returned him to the same room they had held for him since his emergency departure, he received a hero's welcome! From the lady who works in the laundry, to the cleaning staff, the care aids, the RNs, the activity workers, right up to the top brass, Dad was greeted with such love and genuine care that my heart sang. My father was a bit overwhelmed --but in a good way--and quickly felt at ease even though he could barely remember staying there prior to the hospital stay.
As one of my former clients stated "Everyone knows the monkey, but the monkey knows no one". A very apt description when you think of a zoo with everyone peering in the primate house and getting super excited by what they see. That's kind of how Dad must have felt, but the good thing is, he's not in a cage and it doesn't matter that he couldn't remember the names of the employees. The main thing is that they remembered him and were happy to see him come "home".
My family and I are so fortunate to have our patriarch in a place where he is respected and encouraged to participate or not participate in the daily programs. If he wants to take a nap, they leave him to it. If he wants to join in and sing with the music therapist or ring the bells in the bell ringer group, he is welcomed. Bar none though, his favorite activity which he doesn't bow out of is the afternoon ice cream social which happens one afternoon a week.
I can sleep at night knowing my father is in good hands with people who really love their jobs. You can see it in their eyes and hear it in their voices. I bought a dozen roses and asked that they be placed in the staff room today and included a card that said how much they all are appreciated. Not really enough considering what they do, but a small gesture on my part will let them know that their spirit of service to others is what makes this world a better place.
One day last Spring I met a guy named Andy who owns his own office janitorial company and normally works at night. He explained to me that he likes to visit with seniors and so he has kept an on-call position at a nursing home so that he can still work with people who remind him of his grandparents.
The seniors facilities in my city are full of people with similar stories, the only difference is that they work full time and not just once in a while like Andy. The common link between janitor and care aid is the love for the residents. This was obvious last week when I brought my father back to the care home where he lives. Dad had been away for several weeks in hospital and when I returned him to the same room they had held for him since his emergency departure, he received a hero's welcome! From the lady who works in the laundry, to the cleaning staff, the care aids, the RNs, the activity workers, right up to the top brass, Dad was greeted with such love and genuine care that my heart sang. My father was a bit overwhelmed --but in a good way--and quickly felt at ease even though he could barely remember staying there prior to the hospital stay.
As one of my former clients stated "Everyone knows the monkey, but the monkey knows no one". A very apt description when you think of a zoo with everyone peering in the primate house and getting super excited by what they see. That's kind of how Dad must have felt, but the good thing is, he's not in a cage and it doesn't matter that he couldn't remember the names of the employees. The main thing is that they remembered him and were happy to see him come "home".
My family and I are so fortunate to have our patriarch in a place where he is respected and encouraged to participate or not participate in the daily programs. If he wants to take a nap, they leave him to it. If he wants to join in and sing with the music therapist or ring the bells in the bell ringer group, he is welcomed. Bar none though, his favorite activity which he doesn't bow out of is the afternoon ice cream social which happens one afternoon a week.
I can sleep at night knowing my father is in good hands with people who really love their jobs. You can see it in their eyes and hear it in their voices. I bought a dozen roses and asked that they be placed in the staff room today and included a card that said how much they all are appreciated. Not really enough considering what they do, but a small gesture on my part will let them know that their spirit of service to others is what makes this world a better place.
Thursday, 12 July 2012
No more Alzheimer's by 2025!
What a great headline! Always refreshing to receive optimistic news for a change from the daily paper. It certainly caught my eye because the disease runs in my family. My father, my grandfather, my great grandmother, uncles, aunts, great uncles, were all plagued with some form of dementia. We call it "the family curse." As a child, I heard it referred to it as "senility".
The term senile refers to losing one's mind. However, there are more accurate terms which refer to the actual type of senility or dementia. Large strokes and smaller strokes referred to as TIA's (mini strokes), vascular dementia, Lewy Body disease, Alzheimer's are a few causes of dementia.
Fortunately, great strides are being made with researchers honing in on certain genes and identifying those genes that are most likely to cause plaque on the brain. Recently, some scientists in Iceland took that gene research even farther and discovered a gene that fortunate folks ( 1 in 100,000) have, which deters Alzheimer's. These are the people who will almost certainly not come down with the mind wasting disease.
http://www.wtsp.com/news/article/263580/81/Genetic-mutation-may-protect-against-Alzheimers
Medications are being created and tested that will actually reverse brain plaque and put an end to Alzheimer's Disease. A medical breakthrough that will change people's lives forever so that families like mine will not have to dread the family curse.
I am not yet in the target range for participating in research at my local university but in a few years I will be of that 55 + demographic and will be sure to contact the Centre on Aging at the University of Victoria so they can track my predisposition to memory problems like those of my forefathers.
There are many studies currently being conducted and participants are needed. Some of the requirements are that you are in good health with no history of head injury or stroke in the last year. If you're interested in what the Centre on Aging is doing right now, go to http://www.coag.uvic.ca/ and click on the "opportunities" tab.
I love sharing positive news with you and being the news junkie that I am you can be sure that there will be more of it in the blogs to come. Please sign up to be a follower of my blog and you will be notified whenever I post a new entry. It's easy to do, just click on "subscribe by email" at the bottom of this installment (you should see it near the comments section) or "follow by email" at the side of this installment.
In the meantime, I hope you are enjoying your summer.
"In the garden of thy heart, plant naught but the rose of love"
~Baha'u'llah
The term senile refers to losing one's mind. However, there are more accurate terms which refer to the actual type of senility or dementia. Large strokes and smaller strokes referred to as TIA's (mini strokes), vascular dementia, Lewy Body disease, Alzheimer's are a few causes of dementia.
Fortunately, great strides are being made with researchers honing in on certain genes and identifying those genes that are most likely to cause plaque on the brain. Recently, some scientists in Iceland took that gene research even farther and discovered a gene that fortunate folks ( 1 in 100,000) have, which deters Alzheimer's. These are the people who will almost certainly not come down with the mind wasting disease.
http://www.wtsp.com/news/article/263580/81/Genetic-mutation-may-protect-against-Alzheimers
Medications are being created and tested that will actually reverse brain plaque and put an end to Alzheimer's Disease. A medical breakthrough that will change people's lives forever so that families like mine will not have to dread the family curse.
I am not yet in the target range for participating in research at my local university but in a few years I will be of that 55 + demographic and will be sure to contact the Centre on Aging at the University of Victoria so they can track my predisposition to memory problems like those of my forefathers.
There are many studies currently being conducted and participants are needed. Some of the requirements are that you are in good health with no history of head injury or stroke in the last year. If you're interested in what the Centre on Aging is doing right now, go to http://www.coag.uvic.ca/ and click on the "opportunities" tab.
I love sharing positive news with you and being the news junkie that I am you can be sure that there will be more of it in the blogs to come. Please sign up to be a follower of my blog and you will be notified whenever I post a new entry. It's easy to do, just click on "subscribe by email" at the bottom of this installment (you should see it near the comments section) or "follow by email" at the side of this installment.
In the meantime, I hope you are enjoying your summer.
"In the garden of thy heart, plant naught but the rose of love"
~Baha'u'llah
Tuesday, 19 June 2012
Grey Tsunami winners
If you read my previous blog, you'll know that I asked readers to tell me what they would put in a virtual Grey Tsunami Preparedness Kit. I offered prizes for writers who let me know what they would include in their old age grab and go.
There were many excellent responses. It was obvious that people put a lot of thought into what they would want to carry with them into their sunset years.
Some said I had done a good job with the list but they just wanted to add one or two things. I got a kick out of one of my peers (female) who said she would make sure that a "good sex life" was included!
Another wanted good eyesight, good books to read, and a cat to sit on her lap, as well as the most comfy chair in the world!
Darlene, who is a financial planner, wants you to visit her for your financial analysis and long term care insurance! Besides networking, she says she would bring her e-reader.
Sue wants to hang onto her memories for as long as she can.
Thank you to two of my biggest fans Dolores and Leslie who love the contents of MY basket and think that because I am so prepared that they will be coming to my place!
Kudos to Mary-Wynne who sent me a lovely story which I will share with you at a later date.
The first, second, and third place honours go to (drum roll please)
Martha (a.k.a. Lemonaide Life) for her list of things to pack which included "lots of time to spend with those I love, enjoying the simple things in life"...and "funky sunglasses". You can see her entire list in my comments section.
Bill~ who wants to take all of his marbles and adds "a sense of drama as I journey through Act 3". You can see his clever list which is also in my comments section.
Lynda~ wants a pen and paper and states poignantly "I would make a list of all the people I have loved and cared about, and do my best to put into words, how much I valued knowing them, and how they had enriched my life." She added "I do try to say these things as the years go by, but sometimes I am too tired, too rushed, too forgetful to say what needs to be said." She finished with she would hate to think that her life would end or her memory would fail her without those people knowing just how much they meant to her.
For their efforts they all get Rogers Chocolates made right here in Victoria, Canada. Martha, for her first place win, gets an artsy tin with a sampling of Victoria Creams. I will be mailing her prize to her in Edmonton later this week.
Bill and Lynda get large bars of chocolate and I will probably deliver them in person since they don't live too far away.
Thanks one and all. I appreciate that you took the time to write to me!
Remember that after each blog, there is a section for comments and you can post it as "anon" if you don't have a blog account.
There were many excellent responses. It was obvious that people put a lot of thought into what they would want to carry with them into their sunset years.
Some said I had done a good job with the list but they just wanted to add one or two things. I got a kick out of one of my peers (female) who said she would make sure that a "good sex life" was included!
Another wanted good eyesight, good books to read, and a cat to sit on her lap, as well as the most comfy chair in the world!
Darlene, who is a financial planner, wants you to visit her for your financial analysis and long term care insurance! Besides networking, she says she would bring her e-reader.
Sue wants to hang onto her memories for as long as she can.
Thank you to two of my biggest fans Dolores and Leslie who love the contents of MY basket and think that because I am so prepared that they will be coming to my place!
Kudos to Mary-Wynne who sent me a lovely story which I will share with you at a later date.
The first, second, and third place honours go to (drum roll please)
Martha (a.k.a. Lemonaide Life) for her list of things to pack which included "lots of time to spend with those I love, enjoying the simple things in life"...and "funky sunglasses". You can see her entire list in my comments section.
Bill~ who wants to take all of his marbles and adds "a sense of drama as I journey through Act 3". You can see his clever list which is also in my comments section.
Lynda~ wants a pen and paper and states poignantly "I would make a list of all the people I have loved and cared about, and do my best to put into words, how much I valued knowing them, and how they had enriched my life." She added "I do try to say these things as the years go by, but sometimes I am too tired, too rushed, too forgetful to say what needs to be said." She finished with she would hate to think that her life would end or her memory would fail her without those people knowing just how much they meant to her.
For their efforts they all get Rogers Chocolates made right here in Victoria, Canada. Martha, for her first place win, gets an artsy tin with a sampling of Victoria Creams. I will be mailing her prize to her in Edmonton later this week.
Bill and Lynda get large bars of chocolate and I will probably deliver them in person since they don't live too far away.
Thanks one and all. I appreciate that you took the time to write to me!
Remember that after each blog, there is a section for comments and you can post it as "anon" if you don't have a blog account.
Wednesday, 6 June 2012
Grey Tsunami
Baby Boomers are bracing for a huge tidal wave. It's all of us retiring and growing old together. Flotillas of us searching for availability at care homes. Thousands upon thousands heading to higher ground hoping perhaps our kids will build a suite for us in their place.
The headlines scream like Henny Penny that the sky is falling and that we'd better get prepared. We should run, not walk, to financial planners and get that nest egg bigger. Prudent saving. Do yoga. Stretch. Eat Fish Oil.
If you had a grab and go kit for when the big surge happens what would you include in it? You can pack material goods if you want to or you could stash some virtual goods.
Here's what I would want in a bag ready by the door:
-emotional It'd be great if I didn't sweat the small stuff-
-and some quirky thrown in
The headlines scream like Henny Penny that the sky is falling and that we'd better get prepared. We should run, not walk, to financial planners and get that nest egg bigger. Prudent saving. Do yoga. Stretch. Eat Fish Oil.
If you had a grab and go kit for when the big surge happens what would you include in it? You can pack material goods if you want to or you could stash some virtual goods.
Here's what I would want in a bag ready by the door:
- flexibility (two types)
-emotional It'd be great if I didn't sweat the small stuff-
- sense of humour
-and some quirky thrown in
- volunteerism/service
- strength
- extra virtues
- tons of memories
- the ability to remember names
- prayers and inspirational quotes
- and a few material items just to be on the safe side:
I would be interested in hearing what you would put in your Grey Tsunami Preparedness Kit.
If you don't have a gmail/blog account, you can just send it to me as "anon" in the comments section. I will pick a first, second, and third best and will award prizes.
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If you don't have a gmail/blog account, you can just send it to me as "anon" in the comments section. I will pick a first, second, and third best and will award prizes.
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